twibanana
by monsieurvampire
Summary: Edward discovers new forbidden pleasures, in the shape of a banana. This is 100% crack with no intention of being correct. Edward/object.


It was a grey and cloudy day, a day much like the other ones in the

rainy season of September. And Edward didn't like it at all, he had wanted

to go out, breath in some fresh air and make photographs of his sparkling skin

under the shining sun, for his new myspace acount, which he had just pimped the other day.

But no, today he was yet again doomed to spend his time alone in the large house,

since his parents, brother and sister had left on a holiday to some bloodbank in

a far-a-way country where the blood was said to be much tastier. And he had been

told to watch the house, as he didn't fancy blood as much as they, as they had said it.

The thing called boredom had already found it's way to his head a few days ago,

and so today all he had done was count the tiles in the bathroom, as before

he had counted the tiles in the kitchen, and the days before that, all the stones

around the house, which where actually way less then he had expected, but also

gave him less to do. So at this moment after having counted nearly everything there

was in the house, Edward pondered about what to do. And myspace, while getting a lot

of attention from this girl named 'Bella' who was spamming him with questions like 'Why are

you so pale?' and 'Do you ever say a lot?' And the last question that had arrived in his inbox

during the middle of the night 'Do you ever get randy?'. Well the first question he had certainly

understood, his skincolour was indeed not the most usual one, and he had always been known

not too be that talkative. But horny? What was that even?

So that afternoon, Edward made an epic decision, he asked Bella what this 'randy' was

and how to enter the state of 'randyness'. Of course he could have googled it, but knowing

his brother's ability to find out whatever he did online, he didn't want to risk that.

In a few minutes only, he had pressed the had pressed the 'send' button, and the question

was on it's way to his 'dear' girl. A few minutes later, because the girl was in fact stalking him,

the answer came:

'Use a banana'

Nothing more, nothing less, written in the simple

Bella way of saying things, which Edward really did appriciate as it

would prevent him from wasting any time on understanding the email,

instead of discovering what this mysterious word was, and how it could be achieved.

So a banana it was, he had never thought that such a common object for non-vampires

could be the answer to any of his questions, but there it was and now all he had to do

was find a banana and discover the posibilites of one. He knew that his neighbours, other

rich people always had a lot of fruit in their house which they always offered to Edward when

he came to visit, as a 'younger' boy. So he Put on some clothes and rang the door bell a few times

untill they opened.

10 minutes later he was laying with a banana on his bed, observing it with a large

fascination. Touching the rough banana peel with his fingertips, moving them over every little detail,

he could feel a strange soft sensation going through him, and Edward starting taking off his clothes,

while putting on some music, unbuttoning his blouse, throwing it on ground, with his pants laying next

to it soon.

then as he lay on his bed and the music was filling the room with dancey repetive beats,

he took one of the thickest bananas in his right hand and slowly moved the tip to his lips,

parting them a bit and pushing the banana between it tasting the bitterness of the

yellow brown fruit. Pushing it further in his mouth, in and out, wetting it with his tongue

and lips, enjoying the filled feeling it gave him. Until he felt like he needed more, something

more fulfilling, something just way randier, then this.

So he took the banana tightly in his hand and moved it over his chest, rubbing the

harsh tip against his nipples, feeling the banana getting hot from his warmth and a

strange sensation moving from his nipples to his crotch with each time he rubbed

the tip against his nipples, making his legs press against eachother in need, making Edward

feeling like he needed more and more. So he moved the banana away from his chest,

leaving his nipples alone and moving the long yellow warm object down over his body

while his other hand was pulling his boxers off, untill they were no longer a bother.

Then while moving his left hand over his long shaft teasingly, Edward moved

the banana over his crotch, pressing the warm yellowness against his prick, then repeating

it in fast movements, like it's a natural thing to do, like the banana was meant the

be thrusted against his prick, and make him feel pleasure like he has never had before

even when using his mother's rose shampoo bottle and thrusting in it rapidly.

No, this banana was bliss, the way it felt against his hot cock, the smoothness, the lines

of the banana that fitted the shape of his manhood so well. Bella had been right, this

randyness that he was supposed to feel, it could be achieved with a banana.

But even as his cock was pressing needingly against the fruit, it was not enough,

Edward needed more, so he moved his legs up and moved the banana between

his buttcheeks, pushing the tip in slowly, biting on his lips from the tingling feeling it

brought up. And pushing it in further, feeling the fruit deep inside of him, moaning

with every thrust.

And as he could feel the fruit against his sweet spot deep inside, he had to

think of one of his favourite vampire heroes, Dracula... a manly being he

had once seen at a fancy party, and had always lusted for. And as he

kept thrusting the banana deep inside of him, with rougher and faster movements

each time, he imagined it was Dracula's cock, his thick cock making sweet rough

love to him, like no other vampire could do. And it was so hot that Edward found

himself moaning out loud several times with each thrust, his cock throbbing and his

bum taking in the long yellow object needingly. While hearing himself scream

Dracula's name out loud, like the man was there himself, joining Edward in his act

of pure randyness.

Edward's movements because faster and bolder, as he imagined Dracula's hot manbody

pressing against and inside him, and the banana getting softer and warmer, his prick

so hard with need. He thrusted the banana in a few more times, feeling it hit that

sweet spot deep inside of him, and his whole body shivering with extreme delight and pleasure,

his cock dirtying his tummy with warm come, and blood dripping down his chin from bitting

his lips too roughly, panting wildly...

'Oooh dear vampire god, that was wonderful'

He said out loud, as he removed the banana from inside of him, peeled it

and took a bite and then spit out the warm fruit again.

'I should definitely get more bananas tomorrow'

~ Fin ~


End file.
